The Scales
I was thinking this morning about what we have been talking about lately and the thought that crossed my mind was:
”Do we really know who we are and how much we mean to God?”
If we struggle with that, maybe that’s why we have a hard time being still with Him. Maybe, that’s why we cannot be at peace to enjoy the goodness God sets before and rest in the middle of the chaos.
Because, yes, there will be attacks, from the enemy of our soul, set out to destroy or distract us. BUT-AND-AlSO the chaos can be good things that are happening in our lives that can rob us of our peace and our ability to sit at the table in rest.
It’s the hardest for me to rest when I forget who I am TO God and who I am IN God.
It’s when I let others attitudes or behaviors determine how I respond in a siutation - that can include kiddos and spouses - not just rude or mean people.
It’s when I allow my schedule and list encroach on my time with God.
It’s when I allow my insecurities - or default behaviors - invade my heart and mind.
It’s when I allow fear and doubt to cloud and cover what I know to be true.
I really like this version of Philippians 3:10, that I read in a book a long time ago and have it hanging in my bathroom closet, so I see it every time I open it. I think it was from a Hosanna Wong book. It says:
“My determined purpose is that I may know Him,
that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquanted with Him,
perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His person.”
My purpose - your purpose is being with and knowing God in such an intimate and personal way that the wonder of Who He is overshadows everything else.
Do we know your Heavenly Father that way?
Do we, like Paul, want to understand Jesus’ suffering and His resurrection power so we can rest and sit at the table in the middle of our suffering; in our chaos; in our confusion; in our hurt?
I may have shared this before, but when our kids were young and acting like hooligans outside of our home, I would get their attention and give them the look. You know the one. The one that says; “Straighten up and fly right!” That works just as good for a look of encouragement or love or understanding.
Why did just a look work? Because they knew me. We spent together. We talked about what was expected.
They still know. 🤭
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will guide you with my eye.”
Psalm 32:8
I want to know God that intimately. I want to be watching Him or respond quickly when I hear Him call me and gives me the look…whatever one it is: “JB, straighten up!” “I love you!” “I’m proud of you!” “Go over there.” “Text Sally Lou.”
But here’s the rub, the sticky part, the part God loses us, when we stop the train and get off: knowing God intimately means we need to be vulnerable too. It’s not all God being open and sharing His heart with us - which He has by writing down His words and heart for us in the Bible.
I think this can be the game-changer in how we can be still. How we can rest. How we know no matter what is going on around us, God is not shaking in His boots.
He has us. He will protect us. He will provide for us.
Because I have been completely honest and vulernable with God, I know He loves me even with knowing all the ugly and messy parts of my heart and mind. Not who I am pretending to be. That knowing brings a peace. A long exhale. The games can stop. The exhaustion of pretending ends. I can sit at His table - even in the midst of attacks and chaos and rest because I am fully known and fully loved. And I fully know the One who set the table, is watching over me and providing what I need.
In his book The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis writes about Eustace and when he traded his innocence to a deceiver and was covered in dragon scales. He tried and tried to peel them off himself and when he did, they grew back. Exhausted Eustace lays down, completely still and then Aslan comes.
“Then the lion said - but I don’t know if it spoke - ‘You will have to let me undress you.’
I was afraid of his claws, I can tell you, but I was pretty near desperate now. So I just
lay flat down on my back to let him do it.
The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right into my heart.
And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt.
The only thing that made me be able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off.
You know - if you ever picked the scab of a sore place. It hurts billy-oh but it is such sun
to see it coming away…
Well, he peeled the beastly stuff right off - just as I thought I’d done myself the other three times, only
they hadn’t hurt - and there it was lying on the grass: only ever so much thicker, and darker,
and more knobbly-looking than the others had been. And there I was as smooth and soft as a peeled switch
and smaller than I had been.
Then he caught hold of me - I didn’t like that much for I was tender underneath now that I’d no skin on -
and threw me into the water.
It smarted like anything but only for a moment. After that it became perfectly delicious and as soon as I
started swimming and splashing I found that all the pain had gone from my arm. And then I saw why.
I turned into a boy again.”
What steps can we take to determine to know God in that way. It isn’t haphazard, hoping we get it by osmosis by attending church or listening to Brandon Lake in Spotify.
Do we have to wait until we are exhausted and at the end of ourselves to allow God “to undress us” or can we lay down now and let God remove the scales that are covering us now?
What if by allowing the “undressing” we receive the greatest gift of forgiveness and grace? What if we walk away from that fully known and fully loved - free to rest - free to be still - free to be content?
My prayer is that we will be that brave!
You have - as always -
All My Love!
xo ~ Jodi
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